The Sadramble Primer (There's a sadramble standing in front of me. Now what?)

The Sadramble Primer

In dealing with a sadramble, the most important and humbling thing to accept and keep always at the forefront of your mind is that sadrambles came into your life because you attracted them. They are a mirror of your deepest insecurities and neuroses, and they are easy to laugh at because they are such a bombastic magnification of those parts of yourself that you secretly find ridiculous and make you uncomfortable.

I always laugh when I am uncomfortable.

But you do not deserve, nor are you serving anyone’s highest mission, to continue to cosign a sadramble’s bullshit. When you nod and say, “Uh huh. Mmm. Yeah, that is sad. No, go on. I don’t have anything better to do than hear you tell your story again…” you are slowing down their evolution. You are keeping them comfortable in their downward, stagnant loop. You are enabling them. You are engaging in codependent behavior out of a fear of hurting them.

This is not your fault. We are raised to silently resent and squirm, but not to say, “Stop. Just stop talking. You tell the same story every time I see you. You KNOW what you need to do and you are not doing it, so there is nothing more than I can tell you because you are clearly unwilling to help yourself. The fear of change still outweighs the pain of your everyday mediocrity. You’re boring me.” It’s almost as bad to do this as to outright assault someone, and yet by failing to say these words we conspire with them to slowly kill themselves.

When you agree to listen to and “help” a sadramble, you are announcing to the universe that you are just fine with being stuck, thank you very much. And the universe will agree with you and continue to send more sadrambles your way.

Sadrambles are often the people we love the most. In the early days of sobriety, many alcoholics describe their feeling of being bereft as akin to a breakup. Alcohol and drugs have been the most sustaining, consistent relationship in their lives, and so it is temporarily devastating and heartbreaking to experience the separation.

Going cold turkey off a sadramble requires an actual end to a relationship, but like alcohol and drug dependency, sadrambles keep you small, dysfunctional, and sick.

Here’s a handy, simple system for extracting sadrambles from your life.

Avoid their phone calls. You will be doing them a tremendous service. And they WILL find someone new to sadramble at.

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I believe that we are at the dawning of a great energy ramble. All pointless conversations from here on out must be related to the intense transformational process we are undergoing. All bullshitting is in service to the great shift that humanity must undergo if we are to survive another 100 years. All directionless chit chat should be related to growth and abundance. All trivialities should enlighten.

Sadramblers:  your time of purpose on this earth is ending! Please shut up and get to healing yourself. Thanks.

Sincerely and With Ultimate Compassion,

A recovered sadramble